Moving day

Well it's official, Saturday I get the key.
I am moving back to Petaluma~

not to sure if I am happy or sad about this, but hey at least I get to re-design my scrapspace.

Fathers Day

Someone told me that the first year of loss is the most difficult because you have to learn to live without that person for the first time, and you have to get through all the holidays.
I have never been one to do alot for fathers day, and yet for whatever reason today I am missing my father more then ever. *** Happy Fathers Day ***
Aita, I love you and if you are watching over me, please know that I miss you terribly!

Today the Press Democrat reported on the death of yet another soldier in IRAQ.While I am saddened by the continual loss of life overseas, this one was different. This was someone that I once called my friend.From our first meeting in 5th grade, to the many years of joint classes. Kawika was always kind to me, and always gave me a reason to laugh.So many from our class have fond memories of this great man.When the times comes for us to pay our respects, let us all turn out and honor the sacrafice that he gave. Good bye friend, and God Bless you and your family.

\

New Neighbors

Well that did not go how I had planned. I was trying to be friendly and let the neighbor know what his parking space was, and it came across as if I was trying to boss him around.
I introduced myself, and then in my usual unawareness of my myself, I kept talking, telling him which parking space was his. (that of course was not the problem) I then continued to rant about how someone was in my space yesterday, as if it mattered I could have just parked somewhere else. I then still did not shut up, I asked if he was a partier, (as if it was any of my business, his response was kurt and I should have quit but NO... I kept talking.
Mentioning about how I am a student I like quiet, it came across as bossy and bitchy, and believe it or not I was just trying to make conversation.
Now how do I fix this one? I guess the best place to start is talking to Shauna and asking her advice, she seems to be the neighbor that gets along with everyone.
That or here is a concept learn to mind my own business. That is probably the best option.

Think Pink!

Just got off the tele with Peter (my younger brother) and Mom is doing great.

Her surgery was a complete success, and we should have final results early next week. Thank you so much to everyone for your prayers and postive thinking.

:) Happy Easter

Look it up

Thank you Jody for this fun idea.

Not sure I can keep making lemonade...

Life just keeps giving me lemons....
I am so frustrated, and trying to keep my faith... but it is all soo hard!
This last bit of news, have been almost more then I can handle.
Please if you find this, pray for me and my family!~

time for change....

Last night was girls night out, celebrating Jen's (Feb 29th) and my (March 8th) birthdays. We along with Kim and Erica went to Helene's for the Altered Clock class. I was so excited all day trying to come up with cleaver "time sayings" . At some point mid-day I decided on the theme of "time for change"... Thank you Helene's and my friends for a wonderful night out.

Actually keeping a new years resolution.

I am soo greatful for the time I did have with my father.

For the opportunity to work for Marmot (my dream job).

My amazing friends for all their love and support

Being introduced to a new church, that I really love, thank you T.

The time I have to scrapbook, and spend time with those I love.

Bazzile cardstock at 0.49 per sheet.

I have so much to be thankful for!

Today

Today was just another day, and yet today was very different. Before it even had a chance to begin, the relationship that I risked everything for ended.
This past year has been through so much change, so much good change, so much bad change.
I really thought that I was in a space to move forward, that I had met someone that wanted the same things out of life as me... but then reality hit and we both realized that it would never work.
I just want to meet someone that loves and wants me for me... is that person out there?

Well here I am again, trying to maintain Blog...

I have never been very good at these things, but I really want to keep one so here I am making yet another effort.

My Valentines Day was actually pretty great, my friends Corey, and Joe and Thea...all made sure that I was not alone on Valentines day... I was able to go ice skating with great friends, and see an awesome show, and enjoy amazing company...

Thank you to the parties that contributed to making my V-day special :)

Can't seem to stop crying...

According to my best friend, my hair is flat, my eyes are sunken with dark circles, I can not be bothered to wear makeup and I always seem sad...

I do not seem to handling my fathers death real well, I am very sad, and there was so much left unresolved. I wish that I could have just one last time to tell him that I loved him, and how sorry I am for all the times I hurt him. I do not know where to go from here, I always thought that I would have my father in my life, and I certainly was positive that he would one day walk me down the aisle.

I can not go back on what I have done in my pass, I can only go forward. I pray that I am able to live my life and become someone that would have made my father proud.

Wedding Blues...

Last night my dear friend Amelia married the man of her dreams, I am so happy for the two of them and wish this all the happiness in the world.

I tried to keep it together, but when her father daughter dance started I was in tears.My friends were so wonderful and understanding, my intention was never to take the focus off the bride. On a happy note I caught the bouquet, I am sure my Aita was responsible for that one.

Mr and Mrs. Perkins I love you and wish you congratulations.

Trying to move on.

I am here starting my first blog, I am trying really hard to understand
I do not know how to explain to anyone what I am going through, and unless you have been there, you do not understand.

Christina from Grey's Anatomy said it best when she said....
"There's a club. The dead dad's club. And you can't be in it until you're in it."

All I have to say is, I wish that I was not a member.